FUNT AUDITIONS

The Funts are holding auditions for a new front man/woman/thing. Applicants should be no more than 475 years old as of January 1rst. The auditions will be held this tuesday the 17th of November at Another Country any time during store hours. Just drop in and ask the alien at the desk for appropriate forms. Applicants should prepare a short audition program of one waltz, one Michael Jackson song, and one act of self-abuse, which can include either masturbation, asphyxiation or mutilation. Bring pencils and suppositories....
Original article from http://madscience.antville.org/stories/1945611/